Human qualities and apostolic charity: on the twenty-first Sunday after Pentecost

By Fr Gabriel of St Mary Magdalene OCD   |   9 October 2024

From Divine Intimacy

Prelude

Melt my heart, Lord, in the flame of Your charity.

1

The apostolate is the expression and the fruit of caritas apostolica, that is to say, of love of God and neighbour, which has increased until it has become zeal for souls. But besides this essential aspect of the charity which must animate the apostle, there are secondary aspects; we might almost say human ones, that are, nevertheless, of great importance, since they permit the apostle to exercise influence over souls. We here speak of such qualities as affability, thoughtfulness, courtesy, sociability, sincerity, understanding, which although human gifts in themselves, acquire supernatural value when elevated by grace and placed at the service of the apostolate. It is a matter, in substance, of those qualities which St Paul attributes to love: “Charity is patient, is kind … is not provoked to anger, thinketh no evil … rejoiceth with the truth” (1 Cor 13:4–6).

It is not sufficient to love souls in the secret of our heart, working and sacrificing ourselves for them; this love must also be manifested exteriorly by an agreeable and pleasant manner, in such a way that those who approach us may feel themselves loved, and consequently encouraged to confidence and to trust. A rude, brusque, or impatient manner might cause some to go away offended, and perhaps, even scandalised. The apostle may well have a heart of gold, rich in charity and zeal, but if he maintains a rough and sharp exterior, he closes access to souls, and considerably diminishes the good he could realise. The saints, while being very supernatural, never neglected these human qualities of charity. St Francis de Sales liked to say that, as more flies are attracted with a drop of honey than with a barrel of vinegar, so more hearts are conquered by a little sweetness than by rough manners. And St Teresa of Jesus, who wished her daughters to be united by the bond of pure supernatural charity, did not believe it superfluous to make recommendations of this kind:

“The holier you are, the more sociable you should be with your sisters. Although you may be sorry if all your sisters’ conversation is not just as you would like it to be, never keep aloof from them if you wish to help them and to have their love. We must try hard to be pleasant, and to humour the people we deal with.” (St Teresa of Avila, Way of Perfection, 41)

This is very useful advice for anyone who wishes to win souls for God.

2

Concerning natural qualities employed in the service of apostolic charity, we can meditate fruitfully on the exhortation addressed by Pius XII to a group of religious men: 

“Before the young religious (and this could be said of the apostle) becomes a shining example, let him study to become a perfect man in the ordinary everyday things. … Let him learn, then, and show by his works, the dignity proper to human nature and to society; let him regulate his countenance and bearing in a dignified manner and be faithful and sincere; let him keep his promises; let him govern his acts and his words; let him have respect for all and not harm the rights of others; let him endure evil and be sociable. … As you well know, the virtues called natural are raised to the dignity of the supernatural life chiefly when a man practises them and cultivates them in order to become a good Christian and a worthy herald and minister of Christ.” (September, 1951)

There is, therefore, no reason to believe that an antagonism exists between the plenitude of the supernatural life, union with God, and the plenitude of human virtue, deriving from a right development of the natural virtues. We must remember that grace does not destroy nature but elevates it. The struggle against nature making way for grace, tends to mortify and to destroy only what is defective in nature, leaving intact the good qualities and powers to be raised and transferred to the supernatural plane. Grace, and consequently the Christian life, greatly respects and uses all human values; moreover, how could we believe that the supernatural destroys nature when the latter, no less than the former, is the work of God, the fruit of His wisdom and of His infinite goodness?

In raising man to the supernatural plane, God did not intend to destroy in him what had already been created, but only to sublimate and to elevate it. In the light of these principles, we understand why it has been said that the apostle, as well as the priest, must be a “perfect gentleman” (Cardinal Newman). We also grasp why the saints are the more perfect men, in the sense that they have carried the natural virtues to their highest perfection and sublimation. It follows that the saints are more capable than others of surrounding men with amiability, delicacy, and understanding, while loving them with a purely supernatural love; thus they more easily win their hearts. This perfect courtesy, ever self-possessed, even with the importunate, and even in moments of weariness, can only flow from great supernatural virtue and delicate charity.

Colloquy

O Lord, if I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal … if I should have the gift of prophecy and should know all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I should have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. And if I should distribute all my goods to feed the poor, and if I should deliver my body to be burned, and have not charity, it would profit me nothing.

Grant me charity, then, O my God, for charity is patient, is kind: charity envieth not, dealeth not perversely; is not puffed up; is not ambitious, seeketh not her own, is not provoked to anger, thinketh no evil; rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth with the truth; beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things (cf. 1 Cor 13:1–7).

Grant, O Lord, that in consecrating myself to Your service, my tenderness toward my neighbour may not diminish, but may grow in my heart, and may become ever more pure, more supernatural. Teach me to love tenderly all who draw near to me. Make me gentle, affable, agreeable, not to attract to myself the affection of creatures, but to conquer their hearts for You.

O Jesus, if the apostle should be a copy of You, not only in broad lines, but even in details, how shall I be such if I do not try to imitate the gentleness of Your heart? O Jesus, meek and humble of heart, make my heart like unto Yours.